Aha, expanded

Hehe, even more explanation.  China asked a question in the comments that triggered some deeper understanding on my part.  She said:

What about if when a meditative state is achieved such that one forgets that gravity exists, and that there are such things as “physics” or any other limitations that are supposed to apply…if one really gets into the zone…it’s easy to forget about those things…

I don’t think I’ve ever levitated…but when I do a 40+ minute sit, I often lose my sense of body. It’s a little unnerving when it first happens and there is the natural slant to “hold onto the body” which would prevent that floaty thing from happing.

But once I got used to it happening, neat things happen on the other side of attachment.

and I responded:

I’m going to focus on China’s questions since that is the level at which I’m looking at this. Sue Ann, you may be right, but it isn’t the level that I’m comprehending right now, so I don’t really have much to say about it.

China, I’ve been thinking about this a bit, and perhaps this will make some sense. I believe that, yes, the mind needs to suspend disbelief and accept other possibilities for levitation or other skills develop. I don’t mean to discount that element. However, I don’t believe it explains how something happens, just makes it easier to happen.

However, I see no reason for the most basic laws of newton to be incorrect on any level. I believe that a force of some kind is needed for motion. That means, the force of gravity needs to be balanced and then overcome by some other force. Gravity doesn’t just ‘turn off’. Perhaps I’m limiting myself by this, but I don’t think so. But, I’m not limiting myself to the standard forces when saying gravity has to be balanced. If there is an unnamed force that we can’t easily detect, yet is power at the higher dimensions, then there is no violation. Our problem is that, looking only in 3 dimensions we are not taking into account the whole system - quite simply because we can’t. As 3 dimensional beings, we can’t detect higher dimensions without transcending these 3 dimensions. I believe that can be done on the astral, for lack of a better explanation. I’m not talking about lower level astral stuff, but higher levels or vibration states.

Now, what I’m thinking, to get back to the situation at hand is that, when we meditate and we reach a higher vibrational state, we are tapping into higher dimensions also. Then, when we set our intention to do something - say, levitate - our intention is activating on all levels, including higher dimensions. Therefore, we have made something happen that we can’t actually detect except to the extent that it manifests in our 3 dimensional world. Hence, we levitate. Yet since we didn’t see what happened at the higher dimensions, we think it’s magic, or it violates physics. But that simply isn’t true.  Physics just looks violated because we’re looking at a small part.  We aren’t looking at the whole system.  And that is very important.

Aha!

So, today, Andrea asked me if I had any idea why a person would find themselves levitating while meditating or relaxing, without any intention of doing so.  She thought perhaps it had to do with releasing the confines of our mind, so we aren’t bound to the rules of our 3d world.  But this didn’t sound quite right.  Yes, it helps us do it consciously, but I don’t think it explains everything.   Our body is still 3 dimensional, and thus obeys the laws of our 3 dimensional world.  So, in order to float, there needs to be a force to counter gravity.

But, what if we’re trying to understand an upper dimensional phenomena from a 3 dimensional  perspective.  Perhaps the main power of gravity and of a lot of the energy work we do exists on a higher dimension that we don’t see.  So, we feel some of the random affects, like heating or feelings of lightness, when on a higher dimension we could actually see it acting and building.  And then, on the 3rd dimension, we see how it overcomes the 3 dimensional amount of gravity.

So, what I’m thinking is that, we can’t understand energy and anything else like levitation or telekinesis without looking at higher dimensions.  How can we do that?  I don’t know.  But Andrea says this is a lot of the stuff I talk about in my lectures at night while sleeping.  Guess I’m starting to tap into it finally. 

Almost there

The only major change is to chapter 5 which isn’t that big of a deal.  Chapter 5 right now is only 3 or 4 pages long, and when I’m done with it will be about 2 pages longer with some better figures.  Then it’s small edits to my thesis.  Hooray!  But first, I need to figure out why I have drastically different data than someone else supposedly looking at the same thing.  Thank god it’s chapter 5 and not the rest of the thesis.  lol

just because…

And just because I finally figure it out does not reduce how pissed off I am at how difficult this was.  Damn software programmers really piss me off sometimes.

I’m going to just save this and leave it alone now.  It’s time to send this thesis off to my advisor and see what he says.  I’m so done with this…

fuck you word

Why the fuck is it so hard to get you to stop numbering the first 3 pages of my thesis?  The three pages I’m not allowed to have numbered or they’ll reject my thesis - for fucking numbering!  Why does following all the instructions I’ve found continue to give me the wrong results?  Why is this so fucking complicated?  Fuck you word.  Fuck you and your wasting of my time with still no end in site.  Fuck you microsoft for having such a useless website that I can’t get anything actually useful.  God fucking dammit this is stupid.

choosing again

This week has been emotional, and I don’t know why really.  But I’ve found myself able to cry more easily than ever before.  I don’t view this as a positive thing, especially while driving down 183.  So, perhaps I should start there.

Carrie and I have been discussing relationship issues.  They are mostly her issues, and not mine, though I will absolutely own up to my own lack of interaction and connection due to stress and other responsibilities.  I haven’t put her first nearly enough, unless she was sick.  And that is not fair to her.  But all of these discussions happened last weekend.  So when, out of the blue, I was feeling very sad and unable to listen to any songs because it made me feel like she was leaving me, I was surprised.

But, I also realize that I can’t run from this, so I decided to try to figure things out and get my head on straight.  I looked at any fears I could have.  If Carrie left, what would happen?  I would get a smaller and more important, cheaper apartment.  We’d have to divide up belongings.  That would suck, but we could do it without any real issues.  So that’s not a huge deal.  What about the cats?  Well, now that is complicated.  I would think she should take monkey, as he is her cat.  But is it right to separate the cats?  I guess that would be a bit complicated.  What about dating?  I know I would eventually date.  Hell, I even ran through people in my mind for possibilities.  But it just didn’t feel the same.

So, after looking at things from a few different angles, I know fully that I would be ok if she left.  It would take some time to heal and learn to live a bit differently, but I would be ok.  Therefore, there isn’t fear that my world would fall apart, leaving me a homeless alcoholic.  But, and this is the key, I do not want that.  I choose to be with Carrie.  I love her, and I choose to build a life with her, as difficult as it has been over the years.  That doesn’t matter, I still choose to be with her.  I could have another life, but I don’t want it.  Carrie thought I was here only because it was comfortable.  Now I believe she understands that I choose this.  I don’t want to be anywhere else except our life together.

And that, I believe, is why many of these conflicts arise.  Perhaps we get complacent, and forget that we choose this life.  So, life says “Wake up!” and we have to look at it all again.  And then we choose once again, strengthening that connection and life.  We create it anew, adding new fresh energy to the process.  That is why we stagnate - we don’t add anything new to the creation.  Yet, how often is it still what we want?  Probably a lot, we just forget that we need to add some freshness to it.  It’s like air, or water.  It’s not nearly as enjoyable if it’s not refreshed.  It may be adequate, but not enjoyable.  And life is meant to be enjoyed.

Labels

Why do people have to break things up into different parts and label them?  It doesn’t make sense.  Now, perhaps I’m in a space where I don’t see it, or I just want to be disagreeable.  Or, maybe I’m seeing clearly and the arguments people make are just there to help them feel better.  They are not based in reality.

This has come up in two instances.  Most recently, with energy.  Energy is energy.  Do I really need to label energy differently for every single situation that comes up?  If I’m doing energy work with my body, is there really any other kind of energy inside me that I’m using?  Does it matter if it’s called reiki, or working with chi, or anything else?  It’s all the same, just used at a different time.  I guess I just don’t understand.  It seems to simply further complicate things and divide people who are, in the end, doing the same thing.

And then, this argument over the different aspects of the force.  Unifying vs living vs personal.  What?  It’s all the same!  I read through all of the explanations in the library at Jedionline.org.  Three different authors, and not a bit of it resonated with me at all.  It’s just superficial stuff.  I mean, if George Lucas hadn’t come up with the idea of the unifying and living force, I would bet it wouldn’t even be an argument.  But since he did, people spend time trying to force a definition and explanation to something that isn’t based in reality.  Seems like a huge waste of time to me.

Now, here’s my bigger problem.  I can disagree with these ideas, but until I have an alternative way of explaining things, I can’t actually say anything.  I need to be able to explain why these extra labels are completely unnecessary and even detrimental many times.  But since that aspect isn’t coming to me yet, I guess I have to just sit on it.  Hopefully my subconscious will stumble on something soon, because I don’t like having to sit here and wait to help people see things differently.  I also accept that moving too fast will only harm my argument, rather than help.  So I’ll wait until this makes sense fully.  Then, watch out world!  lol

Hairspray

Ok, I’ll admit.  When Carrie used to talk about how she liked the movie Hairspray, I was skeptical.  I mean, it looked so cheesy!  But, I’ve been watching the little performances on shows like oprah and so you think you can dance, and there was something more to it.  So, tonight I decided to treat Carrie and take her to Hairspray at Alamo south.

It was great!  Yes, the lyrics are still cheesy, but there are two things going on.  First, how can you not catch the enthusiasm and positive energy that Tracey (and also the actress) puts out there?  And the music is perfect.  The musicians put so much energy into the music that they could sing jibberish but I would still love it.  If there was a weak point, I think it has to be John Travolta.  I just…couldn’t get into that character that much.  I wanted to, I really was rooting for her, but I couldn’t get past that it was John Travolta perhaps.  I don’t know.  Plus, the rest of the cast was so good that it’s hard to compare.  But overall it was still good.

So, I think we’ll be buying this.  It’s very heartwarming and cute and funny and the music is good. 

confused

I was meditating, just trying to maintain a mind clear from verbalization for as long as I could, when I just got up.  I walked around, trying to figure out why I needed to be up and doing something.  But I can’t figure out what it is!  I looked at my bookshelf, nothing called to me to read it.  I don’t feel the need to write anything.  I’m just…something.  I got up for a reason, but I have no idea what that reason is.  This is weird.

And it’s finished

I just finished Harry Potter.  It was a roller coaster ride unlike any other I’ve ever read, I believe.  I won’t say anything that could spoil things for anyone else.  besides, I’m actually not big on sharing my feelings about this type of thing.  I guess all I have to say is, I’m amazed at how it turned out.  I’m amazed at the creativity that JK Rowling has to have created this story, or channeled it as it may be.  I’m truly amazed.  And I’m sad that this is the last book.  Much more sad than I should be, considering it is still just a book.  But with a story like this, spanning so many years and adventures, you don’t want it to end because you feel like the characters are real people.

I realize JK Rowling has spent over 10 years with this story, and deserves a break to do other things.  But I hope, in the future, she will be inspired to tell us what happens next - in more than a few pages.  But if she doesn’t, I guess we’ll have to fill in the details ourselves.  Though I can’t imagine it would be nearly as interesting that way.  I guess all I can say is, Thank you Ms. Rowling, you have inspired me in ways I can’t even understand yet.