I think my mind is so full on all levels that I haven’t been able to write. My future as of mid may is completely unknown, which is a very difficult place to sit. Here are my options:
1. Work at ARL. However, they aren’t being very interactive which leads me to think I won’t get the job.
2. Work at ______. Ok, I don’t honestly have another prospect for a full time job. I’ve put my resume on monster, but I’m not finding anything.
3. Work part time tutoring and part time somewhere else. Not sure how this would work either.
In any case, I feel confident that I can support us and keep us in our apartment. Will that include benefits like insurance? Not sure. There is one other option I realized today.
4. Work part time tutoring and use student loans from my final semester of school. I might be able to get an extra loan from the credit union, but I’m not sure. It’s also minimally possible that I can get some support from Roger.
So I’m not feeling fear at this point. I’m just confused. I don’t know what I’m supposed to do. Is this a time of faith, where I trust that things will work out? Is this a time of action, where I need to be out doing something? I can kind of combine both, but not well. At this point I feel like I can’t make a single decision.
I’m a person who plans for the future. I’m always excited to plan my next semester of classes. Or to plan whatever my future will be. But right now, no planning is possible, and it sucks. Today I sent a very confused email to Geraldine, the psychic I talk to when I want some insight. Basically, I can’t remember what her rates are, and I’m not sure if I’ll even talk to her yet. But then I read my astrological forecast at astrosabiana. The whole first paragraph is insanely applicable to what I’m feeling right now.
n typical Scorpion fashion, there is more to you than meets the eye. Underneath the surface you are boiling and toiling. Perhaps what you see are elements that you do not divulged so as to avoid a stamp of crazy. You are using loads of energy to try to stay balanced. Your world is changing. Not many books write about the patience of Scorpio, but you are a complete package of acceptance for good or evil once you have committed yourself. You have a thing or two to show when it comes to loyalty, a true leader. Go ahead: ask. There is someone who can give you the advice that you need, if you ask with no assumptions. Listen. This week, you have quite a bit to contemplate about the effects of the world on you and your effect on the world.
So I think I’ll be calling her. I need to put my mind at ease, and I’ve learned some lessons. Also, if I only get the minimum of what I need, then I’m still doing ok, right? lol I hate making decisions because usually it’s not obvious what needs to be done. So much ambiguity.
