Quick updates

Wow, life is so busy right.  So I’ll try to speed update because I need to get some sleep.

The baby has a name.  She is Shayla Nakita Casey-Culverhouse.  I’ll see her again tomorrow when I go to pick up the camcorder before heading to audio engineering.  Hooray!  My baby high wore off monday and I need another hit!  lol

I’m still sick.  Today I saw the doctor.  They gave me a Z-pack and a steroid inhaler.  My peak flow was shit, around 350.  I can’t honestly remember the highest it’s ever been, but 350 isn’t very good.  Hopefully this inhaler helps me finally heal.  What’s funny is that I really had to read the directions to figure this thing out.  It’s very odd, but pretty neat too.  I also picked up coldeeze, which is actually helping my throat.  Zinc is very good for viral things, but it doesn’t work as well when you add a bunch of sweeteners.  And since this product was tested in double blind studies, I feel better about trying it.  I only have 2 days to feel substantially better, and I’m determined to do it.

I’ve been coming to more and more realizations lately.  What’s funny is that I can’t put them into words!  I feel like I want to express, but there are no words.  Then I was reading the energy alert from what’s up on planet earth and she mentioned memory loss - that words could be very difficult to come up with.  It took me a while but then I realized that I have been experiencing that from time to time.  She said it’s because we’re existing on a higher dimension and thus the words just aren’t there.  Thankfully it is there for things I have to deal with at school, but when I want to write other things there are just no words at all.  It’s a very wierd sensation.

Wow, I’m burning up right now.  Thankfully the door is open.  I’ve been in an odd mood tonight.  I used the word pratt for the first time ever, which was random and funny.  I was also goofing around in Ellis’s blog.  I told her she was always welcome in our studio (which is absolutely true).   But then I had a pretend dialogue out of the blue.  “Hey, can I come by the studio tomorrow?”  “Of course.  We have Melissa Etheridge recording tomorrow, but we’ll squeeze you in”  lol, what the hell is that?  Randomly fun!  Woohoo!

So I’m thinking that tonight is either a shift, or I’m just finally feeling better.  Is there a difference?  Perhaps they are related.  Hmm…

I discovered an awesome band tonight that I’m totally falling in love with.  Check out The Cliks on myspace, especially their cover of cry me a river.  It’s awesome!  And the opening line of Complicated lol, it’s not child safe, that’s for sure.

I’ve also been enjoying reading and watching blogs of Katherine Brooks, the writer/director of Loving Annabelle.  I’ve completely fallen in love with that movie (and Annabelle haha).  I’m also completely intrigued by Katherine, who shares some deeply personal parts of her life as part of her own awakening and healing process.  It’s fascinating because it’s a level of intimacy I can’t reach myself with people.  Sometimes I get close on this blog, but there are still things that I don’t say for one reason or another.

Ok, I should call Carrie and head to bed.  At this point I have an outline of things to discuss in class tomorrow.  Hopefully we can get through the list over the course of an hour or so.  Then I can get home and head over to see Christi and Shayla.  After that it’s off to Audio Engineering where we learn mic techniques and get to play with the $100,000 DaKing custom board for the first time.  Oooooh :-D  It should be awesome!  And then, thursday after teaching I’m off to the airport and flying to Oregon.  I can’t wait!  Have I mentioned Carrie and I are totally codependent and hate being apart?  Yep, it’s true.  So I miss her a lot.  Plus, I haven’t seen Kali in 7 years.  Way too long.  Apparently it’s really beautiful there too.  It should be fun (and insanely hectic).

Alright, off to bed.  So much to say, and yet no real words to say it with.

It’s a girl!

It’s a baby, a real live baby!  She was born at 3:08 or so, and is 7 lbs 1 oz at 20 inches.  She’s unbelievably beautiful!  I couldn’t believe how tiny her ears were, or how active she was.  Apparently that’s normal for people who undergo natural childbirth.  We’re all so proud of how Christi did.  She was strong, and brought this baby into the world with such grace.  Also, the coach said Sean was a very supportive and present partner.  It was a magical evening for all.

I went to venusgrupo.com and pulled up the baby’s birth chart so everyone could see.  Not that it meant much to anyone, but it’s still kinda cool.  I’m so happy we brought the camcorder.  We caught her cries outside the room, and showed everyone waiting to go inside.  Then inside we were able to get some great footage.  She was absolutely adorable.  She played with her tongue a lot, and yawned.  She tried to nurse a tad, but I don’t think she was hungry.  What’s amazing is that she bonded so well with both her parents already.  You could see the change in both of them.  Sean understands that we’re there for them now, and he shouldn’t ever feel bad about calling us for a little help at any point.  At this point, I have no concerns.  Of course, I’m still riding the baby high, but things are good right now.  Truly amazing.  I couldn’t be more proud of them.

Unfortunately, Carrie wants a baby so bad right now it’s making her a bit sad.  Thank god I don’t have sperm because we both might just try to make a baby tonight, and we’re not ready!  But damn if that wasn’t so amazing…whew.  It’s almost 5:30, and I know I’m exhausted, but I’m still so…  ok, I’m a complete blathering idiot… I don’t see how anyone can possibly feel anything but love right now.  I don’t know how I’ll be able to handle it when it’s mine… I may explode!

Ok, time to try to sleep.  So much to do today.  Carrie leaves tomorrow :-(  But it’s ok, she’ll be taking care of Kali, and that’s a good thing.

The coming of the baby

I’ve never waited for a baby to come before.  It’s a wierd experience, especially in the middle of the morning.  I’m tired, but excited.  The waiting room is a mix of families, some waiting for the same baby, some waiting for another.  We get periodic updates by the centimeter, and occasionally here yells from down the hall.  It’s just…amazing really.  We’re so proud of Christi.  She hasn’t taken any drugs.  She’s staying strong, even in the final stages where there’s apparently no break in the pain.  I don’t know that I could do it myself, but she should be proud.

What’s also funny is that the ill feelings we had earlier about certain people and situations are fading away the closer the baby comes.  It’s like the energy keeps building and filling the area, or maybe it’s just me.  Either way, I feel myself shifting to a more positive and loving place.  This is so crazy, and it’s not my kid.  How much more intense will this be when it is my kid?  wow…I’m just so filled right now.  Even though I’m tired, I feel great.

I think I could write a million times that this is amazing and never express it fully.  I don’t really have words for this experience, yet here I am typing anyway!  lol  Wow…I’m so glad we’re here, and we’re staying until the baby comes.  After all, tomorrow (aka later today) has to be spent cleaning, packing Carrie’s things, and doing lesson prep and grading.

I think I’m starting to understand now.  This is such a big deal for the grandparents because they’ve already experienced this excitement with their children.  Wow…just wow. 

labor

Our friend Christi is in labor.  Her water hasn’t broken however, so we’re waiting a little time before heading to the hospital.  Carrie said that gives them time to check in and to see what they forgot at home!  :-)  Hopefully this little one comes quickly.  At least she’s coming before Carrie leaves for Oregon!  :-D  Hooray!

Marine

Today I have practically no voice. I don’t know why, perhaps it was the coughing. In any case, I’m getting sick of getting sick. I’m thankful for the break in symptoms during my interview, but now I’m trying to figure out how to heal up as quick as I can. I don’t want to go to Cali’s with a cold. Right now I’m steeping HerbaTussin, so maybe that will help with the cough.

I reserved my rental car today. I was very close to reserving a mustang, because it was only a few dollars more. But, I have no idea how it handles in the snow. Even worse, what if it’s the coolest thing ever and I have to return to my simple Corolla? lol I would rather not know and be able to enjoy my car as it is.

Yesterday I got new dog tags in the mail. I saw my neighbor’s dog tags the other day and it reminded me to look for mine. However, they’re missing somewhere in the madness that is the spare room I think. I had to do a little research to remember what went on each line, but I now have tags again. For those who are curious, this is how the Marine Corps sets up their dog tags:

Last Name

First Initial Middle Initial

Social Security Number

USMC Gas Mask Size

Religious Preference

I find it a bit odd that we don’t have full names, but I’m sure there was a reason for it. Also, when I went to boot camp I listed Lutheran as my religion, though I didn’t care a whole lot at that point. This time I ordered them with No Preference. I like it better this way. What sucks is that the last time I wore dog tags I started to have a reaction where the metal turned my skin black. So I ordered the clear protector to go over the chain, which makes it stiff and less conspicuous. But, at least I can wear them safely. The other problem I’m running into is having too many things to wear. I have my talisman, my moss agate, my leather pouch, and my dog tags. Maybe if I didn’t have boobs it wouldn’t be so hard, but wearing all of that makes me look like I have wierd growths! So now I’m having to choose. I don’t like making choices!

It seems like every day I feel more and more like a Marine. I don’t know why this is happening, and I’m watching very carefully to make sure I’m not getting off track on my spiritual development. Rather, I think the shift has to do with owning this part of myself. If I let my concern over how other people will react keep me from being proud, then I’m allowing fear to control my life. This is one simple way to learn to release that fear and regain my own power. Plus, the core values of the Marine Corps are good values. It’s why we’re draining our savings right now to fly to Oregon and help out a friend. It’s why she feels comfortable enough calling even though we haven’t talked in a very long time. Marines stick together and do whatever they have to for another Marine. Also, I think embracing this aspect will help me maintain focus and motivation at my potential job. I plan to keep things around to remind me why it’s important for me to do my job and do it well. The better our sonar systems, the more lives we can potentially save. It’s just another way I can contribute to the Corps, even while no longer enlisted.

I’ve had some other thoughts lately, but I’m honestly getting pretty tired. I better get to grading so I can get some things done. I’m hoping to go to the final UT women’s basketball game tomorrow. We didn’t go nearly often enough this year, which is sad. I guess we’ll have to be sure to go to more Silverstars games to make up for it.

I hope everyone else is starting to feel better from their various colds and such.

Job interview

By the way, my interview went pretty well.  I was able to think on my feet and answer all the questions, with only a bit of prodding at times.  Overall, success.  And it was pretty fun and interesting.  Sonar is definitely daunting, but it should be exciting.  Also, they want someone to be a jack of all trades, which is certainly something I can do!  It of course takes time to get up to speed, but that’s ok.

They’re going to take a little time to talk to a few other people to figure out exactly where to put me within the organization, so I should hear back next week sometime.  Hopefully I’ll know before I fly to see Cali, but if not, that’s ok too.  I can email from her place too.  Then we can go over all the paperwork and details and start the security screening process.  Then I’ll have a security clearance and can say things like “I can’t tell you, it’s top secret!”  Lol  It’s fun to say, but it’s also serious.  This should be very interesting to say the least.

And now, I need to go to bed.  I have almost no voice.  I think the window of health I had today for my interview has caught up with me and I’m getting hit double now.  So sleep would be nice.  Let’s hope it comes.

Change of plans

It’s funny how things can completely change in a moment.  I got a text message from my friend Cali, who I went to A school with in Pensacola.  She has a terminal autoimmune disease that she’s been on chemo for four years for.  About 2 weeks ago she had surgery for something that I don’t know much about, and then following she caught the flu.  The vomiting caused her to tear her stiches internally, causing internal bleeding.  So she’s not doing well.  The doctors have said her only real option at this point is to be chemically induced to menapause, which is very painful.  And to top it all off, her boyfriend decided he couldn’t handle her anymore and left.  She can’t take care of herself right now and is snowed in, and he left.  What a complete and utter ass!

So, monday Carrie is flying to Oregon to help her out.  I’ll be flying on thursday, and we’re both returning on sunday.  We don’t get in until almost 4am though, so that will be a fun day!  But this is what you do for friends, you help them out when no one else can.  Plus, Carrie’s more than a little worried about her well being.  Cali and I talked for quite a while tonight, which was good.  But it’s hard, because I don’t really know what to do.  Carrie called around and found an in home pet sitter that will come and feed the dog and take it for a walk, which is what she needs.  She can’t get up right now without throwing up most times, so the poor dog isn’t getting much exercise.  She does have enough food though.

I hate that she has to go through this, but I’m so glad Carrie said we should go help her.  It’s been a very long time, since Thanksgiving of 1999 when I drove to northern California to spend the holiday with her family.  Too long…and so much has happened since then.  I just hope this is enough.

Updates - health and career

We spent hours in the ER to get no treatment, just the doctor’s opinion that Carrie has a seizure disorder and needs to speak to a neurologist whenever she can get there.  Thus begins the waiting to see someone who can maybe possibly do something.  But, so far no seizures so let’s try to keep that string going!

Also, I have an interview/meeting of sorts with the ARL people on thursday…in basically a day and a half!  This is a good thing, but I have no idea how to prepare, especially for a process that could take a few hours including tours and such.  Time to meditate and get my focus straight so I don’t do something foolish.

I’m not caught up with grading.  Today I was doing it, then we went to the ER.  Plus, I left my key at school so I don’t remember how much everything was worth.  I guess I know what I’m doing with my weekend!  But seriously, any kid who wants to pull attitude can come try to live in my life for a few days.  I guarantee they couldn’t grade and still be attentive to their loved one as they experience dangerous and scary seizures.  It’s all about balance kiddos.

Also, we picked up the Dixie Chicks documentary tonight which was quite interesting, especially the studio scenes.  We also got the Prestige which looks good, and the new Atari’s cd which sounds good so far, though I haven’t been able to give it a good listen yet.  Perhaps tomorrow on the way to Audio Engineering.  Tomorrow we learn microphone techniques!  :-)  Hooray!  I’m going to video tape the class because I don’t expect Carrie to be stable enough tomorrow.  Even if she is, it’s good to tape for later review.

Well, it’s time to attempt to center and relax myself so I can sleep and set my intention.  Maybe I can get a whole 7 hours tonight

hospital

We’re heading to the hospital.  Maybe they can stop the seizures…no need to kill any more brain cells.

Wisdom for the day

The deep end of the pool is still shallow when compared to the ocean.