A ritual for students

Geraldine recommended reading Psalm 134 7 times before doing homework or studying.  After reading, take 4 or 5 minutes to let it soak in.  Then start studying.  She says it should make things go much easier.  I’ll have to give it a try. 

Psalm 134 (NIV)

A song of ascents.

1 Praise the LORD, all you servants of the LORD
who minister by night in the house of the LORD.2 Lift up your hands in the sanctuary
and praise the LORD.

3 May the LORD, the Maker of heaven and earth,
bless you from Zion.

A ritual for peace

My spirit guide recommended that I burn a blue candle and read the 91st Psalm. This will help my feeling of helplessness that I’ve had surrounding Carrie’s anxiety. I need to use this time to trust the divine, which I know I need to do. Lol Why is that so hard?!

Psalm 91 (NIV)

1 He who dwells in the shelter of the Most High
will rest in the shadow of the Almighty. ^[a]

2 I will say ^[b] of the LORD, “He is my refuge and my fortress,
my God, in whom I trust.”

3 Surely he will save you from the fowler’s snare
and from the deadly pestilence.

4 He will cover you with his feathers,
and under his wings you will find refuge;
his faithfulness will be your shield and rampart.

5 You will not fear the terror of night,
nor the arrow that flies by day,

6 nor the pestilence that stalks in the darkness,
nor the plague that destroys at midday.

7 A thousand may fall at your side,
ten thousand at your right hand,
but it will not come near you.

8 You will only observe with your eyes
and see the punishment of the wicked.

9 If you make the Most High your dwelling—
even the LORD, who is my refuge-

10 then no harm will befall you,
no disaster will come near your tent.

11 For he will command his angels concerning you
to guard you in all your ways;

12 they will lift you up in their hands,
so that you will not strike your foot against a stone.

13 You will tread upon the lion and the cobra;
you will trample the great lion and the serpent.

14 “Because he loves me,” says the LORD, “I will rescue him;
I will protect him, for he acknowledges my name.

15 He will call upon me, and I will answer him;
I will be with him in trouble,
I will deliver him and honor him.

16 With long life will I satisfy him
and show him my salvation.”

Ritual to heal old wounds

First, you write a letter to those who have hurt you in the past.  Make sure you include absolutely everything you want to say.  Take your time.  A few weeks is nothing in the scope of a lifetime.  The point is you should say everything you need to and then you’ll release it.  So, at the end of a probably very long letter you end by saying, “I am no longer afraid.”

Once you have all these letters, you find a private secluded spot and burn the letters (in a safe manner).  Then, scatter the ashes.  Before you leave, say this (and this is exact from what the spirits said, so it’s probably important).

I release all anger, all hurt, all fear, all pain.  It is gone gone gone, never to return.  Then you say, I am free, I am safe, I am secure, I am protected, I am loved.  Then you leave, as fast as you can.  The important thing is to not look back, no matter what.   From that point on, you have a fresh start.  You have released your fear and can move forward.  Good luck!

wow

Today, after a week of Carrie struggling with anxiety and panic attacks, I called Geraldine at the Light Center to see if she could help out. This is the woman I had my very first reading with back in October and I trust her. We started with asking a simpler question, which involves Holloway. The spirits told her that Holloway was sent to me, in a sense, as a guide. She was to teach me some things, the nurture me but also to keep me in line when I needed it. And looking back, she did teach me a lot. Carrie says I needed to learn to loosen up and have fun, which she definately taught me. Just by knowing this little bit of info, I feel a lot better. I’m glad I asked.

The rest of the reading was basically Carrie getting guidance. For much of that I wasn’t in the room, but I know this helped. She gave us a ritual to do to help heal old wounds and start fresh which I’ll type up later. She also recommended we buy a Himalayan Salt lamp, which we just did.

The only place I knew that had them in town and was open past nine was Whole Foods. It turns out they only had one on the floor, which was large, and two in the back that were missing light bulbs. We both found that funny because a lightbulp is an easy fix. So we sent the salesperson to get the other two while we looked around. The two she brought were medium sized, and one Carrie really liked. It vibrates so strongly, and it’s almost pure white. When we came home that was the first thing we did. And let me tell you…it’s amazing! I mean, we both instantly felt at ease. It’s beautiful, and calming. Carrie actaully dozed off while looking at it, and I tried to leave the room 4 times and couldn’t! I know these things get expensive, but for $40 I feel it was beyond worth it. I can’t stop smiling!

I’m going to leave the exercises she gave us to another post. I can’t recommend Geraldine enough though. If you want some good solid info, she’ll have it. The $55 we spent for what ended up being around 45 minutes rather than a half hour was very well spent. And the salt lamps, I also very highly recommend if you are stressed out (and who isn’t) or have troubles sleeping. Today was simply amazing

This is our salt lamp.  It does have some coloring, but very little.

Tools

I’ve spent a lot of time this past week talking to people in various places in their life.  The common element that I’ve found, however, is that all desire change, but did not have the tools to create it.  I think this explains many of the problems with our world today.

No one, if they thought they truly had a choice, would choose to live an unhappy life without hope.  But few people think they have a choice, and thus are trapped.  Lack of freedom is the worst experience anyone can have, I believe.  Thus, if you feel you have no choice and no control, change is practically impossible.  And many people fall into this category, stuck without any tools to help themselves.  They spend their lives treating symptoms rather than the root causes, and thus spin their wheels.
Then there are those people who have known in the past that they have control over their life, they in fact create their life, but have for some reason forgotten this.  Maybe they have gotten bogged down in all the conflict in the world, maybe they lost someone close to them, but something happened that allowed them to lose their perspective.  They have the tools, but lost track of them.  All they need is a gentle reminder to set them back on the right track.
I am seeing my ‘role’ in life more and more clearly as time goes on.  I am the giver of tools.  You see, it does people no good to fix their life for them, because in the end whatever caused their misfortune is still there in beliefs and behaviors.  But, if I can give you tools, then change will be permanent (as long as you continue using the tools) because you have done the changing.  You have created your world the way you want it to be.  I am merely a messenger, a guide.

It’s hard to accept this at times, because I haven’t gotten my information directly from source, but from people in direct contact with source.  For a while I thought this made me, less in some way.  I mean, I could just send people to the books that I read to have the insight I do.  But then Abraham passed along an important piece of information.  Only those who are in vibrational proxemity can receive these teachings.  And this is where I come in.  I’ve been chatting with people and helping them come into better vibrational alignment with their goals, which thus brings them closer to receiving the teachings of Abraham, God (via Neale Donald Walsch), etc.  I am the middleman, which is not a bad thing.  I can help people by bringing them to a point where they can receive the messages I have.

Of course, there are people I send directly to the books because I think they are ready to listen, but for those who aren’t in that place yet, I see it as my role to try to bring them closer to that place.  I will always be that teacher in the background.  No one knows who they are, but their influence expands exponentially with each person they help.  I think this is a pretty cool place to be, personally.   I’m still learning, still figuring out what to say when.  But when I’m in the right space I’ve found the words come smoothly, and they are just the right thing for the moment.  In those moments I am connected to source, even if I am not consciously receiving messages.  My goal is to some day hear messages which will help me with clarity, but until then I will continue to do my best to pass along what I learn and maintain my connection to source.  In this way I will improve the world, rather than add to the problems.

The scale of emotions

A scale of your emotions would look like this:

1.  Joy/Knowledge/Empowerment/Freedom/Love/Appreciation

2.  Passion

3.  Enthusiasm/Eagerness/Happiness

4.  Positive Expectation/Belief

5.  Optimism

6.  Hopefulness

7.  Contentment

8.  Boredom

9.  Pessimism

10.  Frustration/Irritation/Impatience

11.  “Overwhelment”

12.  Disappointment

13.  Doubt

14.  Worry

15.  Blame

16.  Discouragement

17.  Anger

18.  Revenge

19.  Hatred/Rage

20.  Jealousy

21.  Insecurity/Guilt/Unworthiness

22.  Fear/Grief/Depression/Despair/Powerlessness

- from The Amazing Power of Deliberate Intent by Esther and Jerry Hicks

*to be continued*

Love conquers fear

And paper beats rock.  Lol, I don’t know, just popped into my head.  Anyway, I had an extensive conversation with a friend last night about what had happened the night before.  She was thinking that what I picked up on was the large amount of fear in the world, and that I wasn’t in any real danger, though my brain would disagree.  It was either that, or old fears coming to surface.  She recommended sending love out into the world to fight the fear and help heal the world.  I wasn’t sure how much of an opportunity I would have, but kept it in mind.

When I went to bed I first tried to meditate.  Wow am I out of practice!  I need to do this much more often.  As I was meditating, wierd fears popped into my head.  I mean, irrational bizarre things that would only happen in horror movies.  For instance, the ceiling fan falling off the ceiling and killing me.  It’s impossible, I learned that from mythbusters.  Finally, I stopped and said, “These aren’t my fears!”.  I decided to fight back.  One of the most useful things I’ve learned in the past few years is that you can’t make something go away, but you can replace it with something else.  So I tried what Melissa recommended and focused on love.  I took some deep breaths and opened myself to the universe, focusing on people I love.  Then, when I felt like I was surrounded by warm love I focused on the important people in my life and sent them love.  After a few minutes I drifted to sleep.  My fears were successfully conquered and I slept better than I have in days.  I’m still tired because I’m behind on sleep, but it wasn’t nearly as stressful.

So thank you Melissa for the advice, and hopefully others will find this useful too. 

Mom’s home

My mom is home, safe and sound.  The doctor’s were very suprised to see her appendix intact, since she started hurting last wednesday!  Usually they blow after 3 days of pain.  She had one angry appendix though!  But she’s home now, and getting a lot of sleep it sounds.  I’m just glad this was a straight forward procedure.

I tried to call talk to her today, but she was napping.  But I got to hear my nephew say Packers, which was cute.  lol, there’s a lot of packer stuff at my parents’ house, so it’s a necessary word. 

bad night

I don’t understand nights like this, but they are never fun. Last night, I was drifting off to sleep, or maybe already sleeping though still relatively conscious when I’d feel scared. I didn’t see anything, hear anything, just this sense of danger and needing to wake up. I would wake up, see that everything was fine, and try to go back to sleep. What was kind of wierd is that throughout the night I couldn’t remember where I was. I thought I was in one room when I was in another, or even in ‘no place’, just darkness. The worst was the last time when I was in the bedroom and I tried to stay where I was and not be scared, but then I got cold chills and goosebumps and then really wanted to wake up. But, I wasn’t able to wake up yet. You know those nights when you are stuck? I tried calling out to Carrie, but nothing came out of my mouth, everything just stayed in my head. I tried again, and harder this time, but still nothing. Finally I was able to break through and wake up. I decided it was time to move to the living room and lie down with Carrie. I didn’t care that she was reading, I could ignore the light if it meant a little peace. I had wierd experiences after that, but always when she wasn’t lying next to me.

I don’t really know what this all is. My theory, and it’s brand spankin new as of a minute ago, is that I was astral, which is why I was conscious, but also why I was unable to wake up right away. I think I needed time to get back to this place. Now, I really know nothing about the astral plane, so if anyone knows from experience, please chime in. But I’m thinking where I went wasn’t any place, hence the darkness. I don’t know if I was in real danger or not, because I never saw anyone or anything. But things felt worse the longer I tried to stay. Maybe I’m not ready to face whatever all that stuff was? I don’t really know. Needless to say I got crap for sleep, but was able to sleep well after around 5:30 this morning when I gave up and went back into the bedroom. The air matress wasn’t making a good seal, so I had to refill it after a while of both of us on it, and after that I kept imagining that it was leaking. I don’t think it was, but I was too paranoid to sleep. I think that was contributing to my issues in the living room, I can’t remember if I was having other problems otherwise.

This all happened after I’ve been feeling more connected, having more dizzy spells that I know are not body related, but energy related. So I’m not sure what this all adds up to, I just know I need some sleep!

mom update

My dad just called.  The doctors said the appendix didn’t rupture, so she should be out tomorrow evening as long as she feels decent and doesn’t have a fever.  Yay!  I hope she gets some well deserved rest at least.