funk

as in, in a funk, not music that feels good though it has few notes.  The day started crappy, with people pounding on our door at 9:30 in the morning.  Now for a lot of people this wouldn’t be a big deal, but I was working until after 2am last night, and didn’t get to sleep until after 3:30.  So to pound on my door and wake me up 45 minutes before my alarm is going to piss me off. 

 

They were supposed to prime the doors for painting.  At 4pm they still hadn’t done that.  You woke me up so you couldn’t accomplish jack squat, on a day when we weren’t notified of work being done?  Fuck no.  So Carrie called the office to ask why she had to be woke up and then still have nothing done to the door.  Why were we being disrespected like this?  The lady basically hung up on her by saying she’d look into it.  What’s there to look into?  Quit the bullshit.  This new management company is horrible.  They aren’t telling us of days when they’re coming into the apartment, so we don’t know that we’re going to be woke up at 8am.  You can at least prepare for it if you’re warned, you know?  Not to mention the fact that it goes against the lease and state property law!  Fuckers!  We really can’t end our lease fast enough, we’re both so sick of this bullshit. 

 

So, that sets the tone for the day, since I couldn’t shake my lack of sleep and annoyance.  Stat mech was beyond boring, I really couldn’t keep my eyes open.  Definately need more sleep, and tea next time.  Then, tonight’s drum practice was less than stellar.  I still made improvement, but I had no spirit.  And that’s just disappointing.  But pushing through these days and practicing anyway is where real improvement comes, because you’re willing yourself to focus. 

 

Anyway, I’m sure I’ll cheer up once I sit down and read a little more from Abraham.  It never fails to cheer me up and help me focus on the future and coming into alignment with it. 

Word of the day: Racism

Well, actually the word of yesterday.  I’m still not sure how to deal with what I learned yesterday.  For example:

 

I was reminded that my friend is a bit racist, as is her roommate, though the roommate is moreso.  I know it’s a product of their environment, and not because they were ever hurt by a group of people (which is still no excuse for racism), but, this is my thing.  When you become an adult, environment and ignorance is not an excuse.  I believe there is no excuse for any -ism, bigotry or hatred.  I don’t believe people change immediately, and don’t ask that.  But, no one should settle for where they’re at.  Don’t get me wrong, I really do like my friend, and don’t hold this against her, I don’t think.  But, the whole concept is bizarre to me.  I may have grown up in one of the whitest parts of America, but I didn’t hear hardly anything racist growing up.  And as I grew conscious, aka pre-teen, I made a conscious effort to accept everyone.  I slip sometimes too, but I am trying. 

 

In the end, we’re all human.  All the other stuff is superficial.  And besides, we’ve all either been another race in another lifetime, or we will be.  We’ll all be the oppressed and the oppressor.  Hell, in this lifetime we’ll all experience some form of discrimination.  So why do we keep passing that on to another group of people?  Stop the fucking cycle already!  The only way to cure hate is with love, not more hate.  There’s no excuse for not trying in my book.  None. 

 

Oh, there were other things I learned about too yesterday.  Sorry, got lost in the rant lol.  For instance, I watched just part of an amazing special on Eleanor Roosevelt last night on PBS (damn 3am shows).  She fought racism and human rights violations no matter what the cost.  She’s one of my heros.  It just amazed me to realize how much she was able to accomplish in her lifetime.  I know her life wasn’t always great, but her suffering did bring great things to the world.  Also, she was hilarious to listen to during the UN meetings.  I was totally amused.  Someday I’ll get back to reading her biography, because she fascinates me. 

 

Anyway, racism is so stupid to me.  And it was wierd that the issue came up multiple times today, though I can’t remember the other times at the moment.  Maybe I just needed a reminder?  I don’t know.  But I got it, either way.