Protected: More about the vamps (same password as before)

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Recoup

I know it’s bad for my sleep patterns to sleep late in the afternoon.  But sometimes it’s the best thing to do.  Carrie had a bad seizure in the middle of the night again which gave her a really sore neck and hips.  It also required me to help her in the middle of the night.  So we slept in this morning.  Then this afternoon, after showering, we put biofreeze on her sore joints and got her to take a nap.  I read the intro to a Garrison Kieller book.  Then I decided to focus on my own resting and healing, since I had spent a lot of time working on Carrie the past few days.  I slept for 2 hours and feel better for it.  My mood had started to slip before the nap.  of course now it’s midnight and I’m way too awake, but oh well.  I’m going to do a few chores and hope that burns enough energy for me to get tired soon.  I’ll set the alarm tomorrow though, no sleeping in too late.  

 

I’ve discovered that since I’ve been called upon to do it the past few days, I can make a shield really fast again.  I need to do that more often, calling upon it consciously so that it’s available whenever necessary.  I also need to think about how to make it stronger or more potent for those times when it’s necessary.  Overall, pretty lazy day today.  I need to find that motivation, or energy, or something.  Who know’s where Ike is headed, and I hate having to clean in preparation just for a hurricane.  But hey, it looks pretty clear beyond it, so hopefully that means no hurricanes for a while and the atlantic has calmed down.  It’d be nice for the season to end early.  :-)

About the passworded post

I chose to password the psychic vampires post to avoid people seeing something they aren’t capable of understanding.  If you are someone I know and trust, just let me know and I’ll get you the password.  I’ll probably email it to a few people, but it’s easy to miss others at midnight.  

 

I may post a shorter version of that post for general info and post it also to some people that may benefit from knowing about this issue, but I have time.  Those individuals will not be able to do anything for a while, thankfully.  

 

Thanks!

Protected: Psychic Vampires

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Cuong Nhu day 2

Today was class with just Sensei Jared.  It was a little less intense, though we still built a lot of muscle.  “We” learned punches, low block, sparring blocks, moving and blocking, quite a few things.  I spent my time trying to get this high chamber thing figured out, and how to relax at the same time.  I disagree with some of the teaching methodology.  I think he asks too much of people too fast, which encourages poor technique because they’re trying to do too much at once.  But, I’m going to just focus on me.  Maybe in time I can have some influence in this aspect, but until then I’ll try to give people hints when I can and be a good example.

My concerns right now are my shoulders, which are taking more stress than may be healthy, and my arch.  I’m going to experiment with tape on Saturday because if I don’t I’m going to damage my foot.  The goal is never to do damage, so I need to be smart.

I think I should run the bathtub and soak.  Muscles are still sore from Tuesday.  I’m hoping to have a little more endurance in my legs by then.  Plus, it might help me sleep, which is always good.

Cuong Nhu day 1

Oh my god.  I mean, holy fucking shit.  I’m so exhausted, my muscles can do little more.  Tonight was the first night of Cuong Nhu.  What killed us was the 20 minutes (or forever, something like that) of ground work, shifting positions 90 degrees and kicking.  Seriously, dead.  We started with 30 minutes of talking, stretching, and some exercises, including 20 good pushups, leg lifts and side crunches.  Then we did punching in a horse stance (forgot what they call it) and then moving in a front stance and punching.  Then we switched to the ground work where we did a million (or a few less) push kicks and front snap kicks.  Then we did the spinning and shifting positions, and then added kicks to that.  Finally we did more moving with punches and then moving with a front push kick (or whatever it was called).  I didn’t know some of these muscles existed.  I’m going to take a bath and then ice down and set my intention for pure white healing energy.  My wrists are a little swollen, and there are some areas that the spirits are a little worried about, like my shoulders (which I’m starting to feel).

Some things I discovered:  My gi is not good for kicking, it restricts me so I need to find a different style.  I’m out of shape (which I knew).  They use high chambered punches which will take getting used to.  We start with an interesting meditation pose after bowing in, basically forming a ball with your fingers (tips to tips) in front of your chest.  I know there are a lot of energy pathways that are being connected, so I bet there is a chi explanation for that which they haven’t explained.

I’m going to get a little impatient I bet in the beginning.  I want to get to weapons work and more soft elements, but it’ll come.  They start with predominantly hard in the beginning, probably because it’s easier, but soft is included in most elements.  It’s also a very precise style.  For those curious, you can see the advanced stuff by going to you tube and searching for cuong nhu.

I better try to get in the tub and then stretch and cool down naturally.  I need to get some of this tension out of my muscles and then put bio freeze on.  This is going to be a challenge, but a good one.  6 hours a week is going to get me in shape fast, if I stick with it and play smart.  But hey, I did it! 

Oh, and I know I have this issue, but it showed up again.  I’m good with physical stuff until I feel I hit the wall, that I’m giving everything I have, and then I’m asked to do more.  That pisses me off, so I have to struggle to release that anger.  It’s something to work on, since I can’t let that cloud my actions in any way.  I need to relax and just go with it.  If I can’t do it, I can’t do it.  I’ll be able to do it in the future.  Perhaps if I repeat a mantra before class it will help.  I’ll have to give it a try next time.  I expect thursday to be a challenge.  A different challenge though (thankfully).

Records

Today we went to half price books to pick up a science textbook, as they were having a sale today.  We lucked out, finding a biology textbook at a decent high school level (I think) for only $8, which is nice.  We also both found some good records first.  I snagged a Miles Davis greatest hits and Charlie Parker, while Carrie found Bon Jovi Slippery When Wet and Edie Brickell.  Good fun!  Then, when we were checking out I saw a record that I eventually realized was a Jamey Aebersold album.  Most youngsters in school learn to improvise using Jamey Aebersold play along tracks.  Sometimes they are simple but cheesy charts, but this one is all Miles Davis, which could be quite useful.  Carrie hasn’t heard of these, but we just might be able to teach her some basic jazz this way.  If nothing else, I’ll use them to practice.  The best part?  Only 50 cents!  hahaha  Wait, 40 cents!  I forgot the sale. 

When I got home I returned to cleaning the back room so I could hook up the stereo and record player.  We finally got it hooked up, though we’ve discovered the stylus is in pretty poor shape, so it’s a bit touchy.  It works, but skips easily, even when there aren’t scratches.  Thankfully, Lenny snagged two really good record players from a client in Evansville.  We just have to wait until the end of October to pick them up.  I think we’re giving one of them to Carrie’s other step dad actually, but that’s ok.  :-)  The one we have is just really cheap and generic, not meant to handle what it’s been through over the years I would think.

Wow, this whole organizing thing is not easy!  It’s still a mess in the other room.  I have more to get rid of, and a lot to organize.  Right now things are just thrown on shelves and such so that there is some room to listen to music.  Next I need to find a way to make room to make music.  Plus organize the rest of the house…easy right?  lol  It’s all important to clean out and make room in my life for change.  I really want a clean and organized house.  My goal is to continue the process of paring down and getting to the point of finally organizing things so that my environment is supportive of my path.

And now I should see if the bath is cool enough to wash up for a bath and then bed.  Work tomorrow.  While I’d like another day off, I’m also excited to go back to work.  It’s a weird feeling.  Guess that means I like my job eh? 

Small Updates

Things have been relatively uneventful lately.  Every day we’ve been reading the first Warriors book.  The cats really enjoy the book, though Monkey doesn’t like how they think poorly of kittypets.  But he’s always asking for more of the story.  We read one chapter a night, unless there’s a short chapter and then we do two.  Personally, I find some elements of the story annoying, but that’s because they’re hard to read out loud, like mewed vs meowed.  lol  But in general interesting books.

Carrie’s doing well with her brain rehab.  She is struggling with some other areas that are triggering panic attacks, but we’re working on that. Today we’re supposed to get in more physical activity, like throwing the ball around.  I think I’ll try to teach her the first shotokan kata today, just the first part.  But we’ll see how she feels.  She had a seizure last night that did a wonder on her brain, the kind that look like a stroke because she has lost a lot of control over one side of her body.  It always comes back though.

As for me, the nausea comes and goes.  I still think it’s energy related, as it is relieved when I do the lavender salt baths.  But it’s not a complete 1-1 relationship, so who knows.  I’ve noticed the past few days that when I get up at work there are times when I feel like I’ve forgotten something, and that I’m exposed.  Not that I’m not wearing any clothes, just that part of my clothes is gone for instance.  A little light bulb went off in my head and I asked if my wall has been dropping or weakening or something lately.  She said yes, but I made the mistake of also dropping my shield with it.  The two are not the same.  The problem is that I wasn’t consciously dropping either, except that one meditation that I did.  So I guess that means I need to remember to check my shield for holes and patch them up more.  I don’t want to try to strengthen it right now, in case I put the wall up with it, but I will make sure it’s whole and see what that does.  Apparently I’m talking a lot in my dreams which is probably due to the hole-y shield.

I’ve noticed that even though I’m not sleeping the greatest I have more energy and awareness, at least at work.  Perhaps this is also a nice result of lowering the wall.  This week, depending on what Gustav does, I should be starting Cuong Nhu.  We’ll see what that does to my energy since it runs until 9:30 pm.  But it would be nice if I can make it work and get back into shape.

I should probably start thinking about our storm preparations.  We’ll probably go fill our water jugs this evening.  We only have hot water in the apartment (most bizarre plumbing problem I’ve ever seen honestly) so we have to drink our water that we would otherwise store.  We do have 5 gallons that aren’t open yet, and we’ll refil 2 tonight.  I figure, if we start to run low and we’re still in trouble, we’ll just drive until we find some.  :-)  Or we can drive and evacuate after if we’re not going to have power for a few days.  It isn’t far.  Looks like all that dangerous stuff from the storm is on the west side, which could mean interesting life for us.  Hmm…

follow-up

Leah is filling in some blanks.  She said Blas wasn’t a dog, but was killed by a dog.  Sometimes the mind confuses things.  And she wasn’t a human, but she was very close to a human at a time when people didn’t have house cats.  He was a writer, and she would watch him write by candle light for hours.  That’s why she loves stories and also to watch me write.  The mode is different, but it ends up being the same.  Ah, Leah said the man worked for a newspaper and Blas would sit on the desk and watch him.  This was when newspapers were written by hand and then sent in for the moveable type machines.  He would tell her how important their work was, so she feels important when she watches me write.

So fascinating…I have a damn amazing cat!  Apparently blas told Monkey that we’re all going to change the world.  :-)  Wow, and also apparently someone tells her every year how old she is, that’s how she knew 246.  But Leah had to tell her that she was 16, because cats count by paws.  She said my paws, my paws, my paws, my paws.  (see, 16!)  and Monkey just knows he’s more than his paws, so we told him he’s 6, which carrie then translated as your paws and your front paws.  Ah, kitty math.  lol

The Mythology of Cats

I’m not sure where to begin.  It all began when Carrie asked that I teach her something about the planets.  Blas asked what a planet was, so we tried to explain that we live on a planet called Earth.  She said no, earth is what you make a bed in when you don’t have a home.  So I said, if you could go high in the sky and look at where we live, it would look like a ball - and she said, where the cat gods live.  That was unexpected…and she told us a story of her truth.  The mythology of the cats.

When good cats die, they become the stars which light up the sky.  That twinkle of light is then passed to the eyes of a new cat who is given the light in their eyes to see good.  Special cats are also given the memories of the other cats to help them.  She said that’s why her eyes are different from our eyes, she has the sparkle from the cat gods.  That’s how she knows so much.  Not all cats do apparently.
I tried to show her a picture of earth and she wouldn’t look, she said something like it wasn’t right or something, but I think she was confused.  So I tried another route and asked her if she knew about the big white ball in the sky.  She said of course, it has the power over water.  This blew me away, because there are plenty of people who don’t understand that the moon controls the tides.  The moon has significance for them, as it provides light which they use to see at night.  So they appear to view the moon as theirs.  They also believe their special sight allows them to rule over all.  She also said that due to the amount of kittens born, few are special, or sighted.  A cat could have 10 litters and not one of them would be special, they would just be told the stories.  I just asked her if that’s why they have so many kittens, she said they have to survive.  They expect humans to kill them all, and they need the special ones to lead them so humans can’t kill them all.  And that their blood tells them to have lots of kittens. She also said it is a great honor to have a sighted kitten, and that any number of normal kittens would be sacrificed to ensure the sighted one survived.  She learned that three others were sacrificed so she would live - two in the womb and one after because there wasn’t enough food.

As part of her memory, Blas understands a lot, not just about house cats but big cats as well.  She said that the humans build, and they push the big cats out, and they knew they had to get small so they would have homes.  But humans are still dangerous, and they fear us even as they watch over us.

Blas is 246 years old apparently - she doesn’t know how many lifetimes that is.  This time around she is 16, which is impressive alone.  She has been a few big cats, many smaller cats, and even a dog once, though she doesn’t remember them.  She thinks she was a human once, which is why she has such a good understanding of people,  but she can’t be sure.

If I wasn’t sitting here listening to all of this, I don’t know how much of it I would believe.  But I am sitting here, and I know my cat is telling the truth as she knows it.  I have a very special cat.  I’ve always believed some animals have far more consciousness than we gave them credit for, but the depth…this is so remarkably similar to other human mythologies it’s surprising.

And poor Monkey hears this and worries that he isn’t special…cats can get hurt.

She’s happy I’m telling this story, even though people won’t believe me.  We hope to tell her stories to children.  Children will believe, they will want to believe.  Children have the same sparkle, but humans lose their sparkle, and it goes back to the sky.  Except some people, like Carrie who keep their sparkle.

She said their teachings tell them that many of them will die all at once, and humans will be the reason.  Unless we teach our children to keep their sparkle.  If we teach them to see in the dark, to see everything around them.  Teach them to see that the moon moves the water, and the sun dries it up.  And that all of this is important.