The final chapters of Monkey

Last night I had a dream where I was in a building and saw Monkey sitting in a windowsill.  I gave him a pet but then was very confusing because I was conscious enough to know he was dead and couldn’t have just gotten back to ‘our house’ (it wasn’t our actual apartment). And then I worried about how we were to get a new kitten in the morning when he was back, even though I didn’t know how he could be there.  After I woke up, Carrie had had a seizure and was looking for Monkey.  After explaining to her what had happened to him (which is always painful) we realized she had seen him too – he had been here though he didn’t know how he got here either.  He actually had sensed her seizure from where he was, off on his adventures, and came back to help.  We learned this morning what he’s been up to.  He’s having a great time, and I wish I knew why that made me sad.  But I want to write this so I can remember in the future.

Savannah has been scouting for animals who are more tame and able to see him as well.  The giraffes freaked him out because it tried to lick him.  His favorite was actually the hippopotamus.  When he saw it he jumped on it’s nose and said ‘hippopotamus!’.  The hippo just laughed and said ‘I could kill you’ or something like that.  He kept pouncing on his nose, the hippo made hippo noises, he made noises back and they had a great time.  Savannah said they were probably going to go back again.  I don’t know how his trip to the lions turned out yet.  Tonight I saw him out of the corner of my eye, walking into the living room.  Apparently he wanted to see the new kitten – he’s happy with our choice.  This should be his last time visiting us.  He has a little more adventuring to do and then he has to get to the stars.  We’ve all learned that he has a special job waiting for him – to teach other cats about the modern world.  T said they know a lot about the old world but the world and humanity is changing so fast they can’t keep up.  He learned so much in his time here that he can pass on.  If the cats don’t believe there’s enough good in humanity and the world then they may just start dying off as a species and just stop incarnating.

We’re very proud of him.  I know that we’re blessed to know so much but it’s hard for it all to be so real.  Tonight we got a card from the vet that tried to save him and then put him to sleep.  It was a personal written note that included details from our conversations with him where we told him how Monkey was attuned to Carrie’s seizures, loved music, all of that stuff.  I know we’re not done working through our grief, it’s only been a few days, but I’m hoping we’ve dealt with most of the difficult things and everything else gets better with time.

It’s still hard on Blas as well.  When she met Bristol today she cried because it was finally real.  I don’t like it being real.  Granted I love having Bristol around, she’s so sweet and cute and loving, but I want him here.  I don’t like being sad and crying, I don’t like it for Carrie, and I don’t like it for Blas.  I know I’m selfish about this because he’s doing important work.  While he was here he did important work helping Carrie and he earned his rest.  I’d just like him back.  I wish I had spent more time with him recently – but I still haven’t learned to appreciate people when they’re around and instead assume things will always be the way they are.  Even after all the illness, pets dying young, people dying young…when will I learn?  It almost makes it harder that he understood that I was working so I could make money and buy him treats.  If only he’d known how little time he had, or anyone really.  And this is way too sad.  He was a good boy.  He did more than we asked of him and he’s going to be great at his new job.  And we’ll get to work training Bristol in the ways of modern humans.  And eventually we’ll all be ok.

Doing better

I think I’m getting better at this grieving thing.  I’ve been focusing on being ok, knowing that Monkey is ok and having the time of his life. I miss him but it helps knowing we’re looking at kittens in the morning.  I contacted the shelter and already filled out the application so once we find the kitten we’re ready to go.  Granted, I can very easily get myself quite sad by allowing my thoughts to go down the wrong direction.  For instance, Monkey’s going to miss the super bowl.  He knew football as ‘touchdown’, and basketball was ‘3 points’ because that’s what was yelled most often.  He just liked when we got excited I think, so his missing the super bowl sucks.  And I was watching the view when they showed footage from Whoopi performing in the Lion King and thought that he would have loved seeing that.  But then I realized he was probably already in Africa seeing just how tall a giraffe is and he didn’t need to see the Lion King.  My mantra has simply been, ‘he doesn’t mind’ or ‘it doesn’t matter to him anymore’.  I know he’s happy which is what is making this all easier.  I’m determined to be ok because I know that as I get older there will only be more death, not less.  I don’t look forward to that, but there’s no way around it.  Since I’m not ready to die yet I have to accept the challenges life will bring.  Even when they suck…

Loneliness

Monkey’s loss is probably the easiest on me because I’m used to going to work.  For Carrie and Blas it’s much harder because they spend all day at home together.  Blas really didn’t think he would go before her.   I’m worried about both of them being so sad.  Blas isn’t eating much, except treats.  I’m hoping to get her to eat some soft food tonight and will only give her treats as a last resort.  She needs to eat, and I know she’s grieving the loss of basically a son but I can’t let her get sick from lack of food either.  I’m debating what to do Saturday.  If they gave us the option of taking home a kitten that day I may actually do it so Blas isn’t as lonely while we’re at the hospital.  Perhaps there won’t be a decision to make because there may be a waiting period.

So yeah, everyone is really missing him.  Blas said that whatever cat we get she’s been told it’ll need to learn about modern life, as it hasn’t been here since more of the middle ages when humans didn’t keep cats as pets.  It’ll know all the old stories of the big cats and how humans used to be, but not anything about modern life.  We’ll get to teach it modern language, tv, music…so it’s kinda like having a kid around which is one of the many things that made Monkey so much fun.  It took him months to believe me that a shower was called a shower and that I wasn’t just trying to trick him into saying a funny word!  lol  I can’t wait until saturday at this point.  We’re going to be sad no matter what, but having a kitten will ease the transition I think.

Bristol

Today we put Monkey to sleep.  He was born May 16, 2002 and lived the best life he possibly could.  We didn’t realize how hard his life was until yesterday when we saw he had a birth defect that caused him to have a malformed right rear hip, a bad disk near his tail that explained why he couldn’t lift his tail above his back.  It also appears that his organs were just not meant to handle things.  His organs have been swelling.  Two nights ago he wasn’t really moving so we knew he felt bad.  Yesterday after the neurologist we took him straight to the vet and he was so swollen and in pain.  They did a lot of things, drained his bladder which was blocked somewhere, gave him fluids and antibiotics, and gave us food to feed by syringe.  We fed him a full can but he never was able to go to the bathroom, eat or drink on his own.  Carrie stayed up all night with him as he got worse.  I tried to feed him in the morning but he just wasn’t doing well.  He was in so much pain we knew there was no other option.  Blas reinforced this and said there’s just some things you can’t do anything about – he was just born wrong.  So it’s been a hard day.

He went peacefully, ready for an adventure.  We let him choose the music – he chose Evanescence.  :-)  He talked about getting to go see lions and giraffes.  We explained to him that he could go anywhere he wanted, told him about Shae and her time after she died so he knew some ideas.  He wasn’t scared at all by the time Blas was done talking to him last night and what we talked about today.

Carrie’s animal, Savannah, has been with him today.  Time is relative out of body and for him it’s been only minutes.  He’s loving his new tail and leg.  Apparently he’s been chasing and pouncing his tail and having a good time.  They expect he’ll learn how to go places tonight.  He wanted us to know that he’s in no pain and he understands how doctors help now.  He knows he’s out of his body as well.  He wants us to be ok, to just watch our mama stories.

Now to the title, Bristol.  Apparently, when he left he said that name.  Blas also said it. I told Carrie about this website, petfinder.com so I figured I could just glance and see.  Blas said the name might not be Bristol, that Bristol is a star.  I searched for kittens nearby and let Carrie look at the list.  She stopped at a cute kitten currently named Gracie that she said looked like Blas’s eyes – that special quality that we want.  Saturday we’ll go to the shelter to meet her and the other kittens.  Blas finally explained what Bristol meant.  Looking on the internet it’s a word that means by the bridge, and is a word they (the star cats) use to refer to cats who have recently crossed from the stars.  So we’re looking for a kitten that’s still special, of the stars.  Hopefully it’s Gracie who is the same build as Blas, with similar markings but with silver coloring instead of the mottled color of Blas.  And if it isn’t Gracie, it will be another kitten of the stars, another Bristol.

We are in no way replacing Monkey.  We’ve never attempted to replace our animals.  But there is an imbalance in our family now.  There needs to be young energy in the house, a new generation to learn Blas’s stories, someone to entertain everyone and keep them from being too sad or lonely.  I want to do it before starting my new job, if possible, otherwise for sure before going to Abu Dhabi.  We’ll see.

Either way, we’re just trying to not cry so much and remember the funny stories and not be too sad.  At least we know Monkey is having so much fun and is finally out of lifelong pain that we were never even aware of.

Forward and back

Today we had a good appointment with the neurologist.  Carrie is scheduled for the Epilepsy Monitoring Unit next Monday.  Her Dilantin has been reduced again and overall she’s feeling better about the situation.  Then we got home and our younger cat is very sick.  We realized he hasn’t eaten in two days, was drinking but not going to the bathroom.  His belly was swollen and sore so we went to the vet.  He is in pretty bad shape.  They had to sedate him and put a catheter in to empty his bladder.  His organs are inflamed as well.  He’s gotten fluids and this food that’s soft enough to use with a big syringe but solid enough not to make a huge mess that we have to force into him.  So far we’ve gotten over 3/4 of a can in him, but that isn’t enough.  He’s not drinking enough either so they’re going to want to put in a feeding tube and more fluids tomorrow.  But we can’t afford it.  Today cost over $500.  Carrie’s hospital stay is going to cost $150/day next week, and I have to buy a plane ticket for her mom as soon as my tax refund hits.  I don’t have a clue how to pay for all of this.

We have decided to simply re-sign our lease and I’ll just commute 40 miles each way for an extra 6 months.  There just isn’t the money for deposits and other moving costs, so this is the only realistic choice.  That saves some stress and adds a different one, including killing a huge chunk of my free time.  But, as long as this monitoring goes well Carrie won’t need as much help.  This is going to be a financially painful year though…

But right now the priority is on conserving unnecessary spending so I can take care of Carrie and Monkey.  The loss of Monkey would destroy Carrie right now so I’ll do whatever I have to, I just wish he’d eat and make things easier.

Scared of hospitals

I don’t have a horrible fear of hospitals.  In general, it’s not a big deal.  Hospitals are helpful for people, and I don’t get automatically creeped out at them.  But for some reason, when it comes to Carrie and them admitting her I get scared.  We’ve never been able to get the paperwork signed for me to have medical power of attorney.  Legally, the hospitals can kick me out because I’m not a relative.  That’s damn scary because, in the end, I don’t trust them to take care of her.  This wasn’t always the case, I used to trust the doctors, but after years of even the ‘experts’ failing us I think I’ve lost that trust.  So now the thought of having to check her in scares me.  And maybe that’s what is going on now.  Tomorrow we should be heading to a different hospital in downtown Houston.  We have to go through the ER to get into the Epilepsy Monitoring Unit, even after the neurologist we talked to said she would just call a doctor and get her admitted.  So even the doctor that did the most good lately has failed us.  I’m hesitant for so many reasons.  What if we go up there and we still don’t get into the EMU?  What if they don’t let me stay up there at night?  What if they make things worse?  So many scary ‘what ifs’ that it’s hard to not let it pull me down.  Plus, I really don’t want to deal with Carrie’s family.  Not all are bad to call and update, but she has a former step-mom who’s insane, has a messed up voice so I can’t understand what the hell she’s saying, and you can’t get off the phone for anything.  I despise talking to her so I don’t want to call her.  I don’t care if she’s worried.  I know that doesn’t make me a very good person in that situation, but if she can’t respect my time and responsibilities for her and interferes with those, then too bad.

I don’t know how to make it through until this resolves.  The good thing is, time keeps moving whether we want to or not.  Even if I start to lose my nerve I have one badass Marine to kick my ass to do the right thing, even when it’s scary as hell.  I just wish there was someone here to be her advocate when I couldn’t be there, like a friend.  You know, it’s kinda shitty that Carrie has flown to be with people when they needed help yet there’s no one to do that for us.  It sucks that we don’t have many friends because of her being sick and not being able to meet people local to us.  It sucks that the one person I could talk to about all this hospital shit is dead so I can’t even talk to her about it.

I’m just tired.  I didn’t think it’d go downhill so fast after the last hospitalization.  I don’t understand why it has, I don’t understand why it’s so hard to get help.  I just don’t understand much of anything anymore.  I really don’t want to be pushing all of this right up to the new job.  We need time to enjoy each other, not sick, before I have to disappear for 2 weeks.  And I don’t mean sex, I just mean being able to go to the beach and have a normal day like everyone else in the world who isn’t chronically ill.

In the end, the worst part of this fear is it completely overwhelms my intuition.  I don’t want to go to the hospital tomorrow.  I think about it and feel myself slow down and resist anything to prepare for this.  I have done some preparation, just not as much as I should.  With all the time I’ve had tonight I should have the kitchen clean.  Sure, I haven’t always felt good, but I still should have gotten more done.  I need my energy for tomorrow, so I better get the dishes in the dishwasher and run it.  Then I’m taking a sleeping pill and making myself go to bed.  When I know something I dread is coming I resist sleeping, as if it makes tomorrow come more slowly.  I know it’s illogical, but it’s just what I do.  I think I just really need someone who knows to tell me that this is just normal fear and that Carrie will be fine.  But even the guides don’t know usually, so it’s just stupid faith which doesn’t help very much.  Anyway…it’s a rough night for me clearly and I need to get moving to counter this energy.  You don’t cure this by sitting still.  plus, if I don’t submit I may lose my nerve.

Keeping up with day to day life

I understand how being a mom is a full time job in itself.  Ok, a parent, assuming the parent actually tries to keep up with everything.  This week I’ve done better than previous attempts.  For a week I’ve only cheated and ordered prepared food once – Domino’s – which was a good deal and lasted for multiple meals.  Since then I’ve made a single 3 lb pot roast last for three days!  Monday at lunch I got the pot roast started so it could cook for the afternoon.  By the time I was home it was done.  I made the mashed potatoes and even made gravy from scratch for the first time so we had a good dinner with leftovers the following night.  Then I had the simple idea to take the remaining pot roast, clean the fat off it and shred it to be added to egg noodles (whole wheat) and gravy.  It was amazing!  Really it’s not much different from making beef and noodles, just a different gravy.  This stretched the rest of the meat for two days by itself.  I still have a little left in the fridge!  lol  On top of that I kept up with the dishes mostly, kept the house from getting more out of hand than it already is, and even did a little extra cleaning.  My nights are very full but I’m getting all the important stuff done.

I won’t lie, I’m certainly stressed out doing all this on my own.  The cats are being obnoxious in their own ways.  Monkey’s bowel problems are worse again, and I have no idea why.  It smells and is a mess and I can’t handle that mess right now.  And Carrie’s doing a good job staying off her ankles but they are very slow to heal.  Plus she’s not sleeping enough, I’m not sure why, so she had a small absence seizure tonight.  I don’t think she knows she had it yet, and I’m not going to tell her.  But I made the decision to knock her out with an ambien.  Her brain is doing so well, it just needs sleep.

I’m also making my last set of doctor appointments while I have the same insurance and a flex spending account to reimburse from.  Today I went to the optometrist and updated my prescription for my new job (and safety glasses) and had them order contacts.  I’m sick of not being able to see when we’re swimming, or wearing sunglasses in the hellish sunlight that defines Texas (and soon, Abu Dhabi) summers.  This is not a vanity thing as I fully believe I look better in glasses, but an eye health issue.  Hopefully it works out.  I have astigmatisms and apparently steep eyes so they had to order the trial pairs even.  But next week I’ll see how much contact lenses have changed in a decade.

Friday I’m going to my regular doctor for a thyroid checkup.  She wants to see if my dosage is ok before refilling.  I have to admit I’ve been really off lately, like before I went on ambien and thyroid meds.  I’m not going to sleep early enough, the ambien doesn’t seem to touch my level of consciousness, and then I have to sleep in to get close to the sleep I need.  During the day I’m tired until I’m up and doing something.  Maybe I just need some physical activity, it’s just so hard to fit into the day right now.  Life is a delicate balance that I threaten to upend daily.  But soon Carrie will be up on her feet again, learning to cook and clean, and I’ll have the time to start working out.  Then we can do some things together, slowly rehabbing her.  Ah, someday…you are a very elusive day.

So I’ll try some stretches tonight before lying down.  With the audiobooks playing it’s hard to meditate in bed anymore, but I can focus on my breathing.  It’s time to return to fundamentals.  I’ve reach the limit of what I can do on my own without supporting my mind, body, and soul.  Time to wake up! (or actually, go to sleep lol)

Financial spring cleaning

I know most people are still in the midst of winter, but in Texas it’s been in the mid 50’s and rainy, which to me feels like spring even if the southerners still call it winter.  I’ve been doing a little spring cleaning and hope to continue through the weekend.  My first major accomplishment was taking care of some credit report stuff.  I’ve known for a year and a half that someone else has been linked to my credit report (just out of lazy collection agency action and not fraud) but haven’t had much luck fixing it.  After a few phone calls I finally got experion to go through and take of everything linked to the other person – the social security number, addresses, and one lingering unpaid bill.  Then I tracked down a free Transunion report and initiated the dispute process for a few things wrong on there.  I also took care of two old debts that weren’t too expensive.  That leaves two that I want to check on the amount of debt before I setup a payment plan of some sort.  At this point I will no longer have any open accounts that are negative, just positive ones.  I’m hoping I can get lucky and refinance my car loan because I’m paying insane (18%) interest on it, which is just ridiculous considering how much money I make!  I can’t control that I have $90,000 in student loans, and can only pay down my credit cards so much while saving for the upcoming move to a new apartment.  At least I can talk to a loan agent and tell them to look at how I’ve been working to improve my credit over the past year.

Tonight I did some cleaning in the house, with much more to come tomorrow.  We brought back a small curio shelf type thing from my parents which I realized would be perfect for the bedroom.  It now holds Carrie’s special dragons, the owl she got for her birthday from Andrea’s youngest Ryan, the new leopard ornament she got for Christmas, as well as a new bamboo I got at the store last night and her tiny sleeping clay dragon.  I want her to have lots of good things around without them being in danger of being knocked over.  I plan to get the rest of her side of the room clean tomorrow so it’s a more healing environment.  I also need to take down the Christmas tree and try to organize all the decorations so they take up the least amount of space necessary.  Finally I need to get the dining room area straightened up again.  It wasn’t too bad before we left, but the return from vacation means a lot of stuff just gets dumped.

By the end of the weekend I expect to have a lot of small random stuff to get rid of.  I don’t want to go through boxes until I have the clutter that’s already out in the apartment taken care of.  Then I can more easily manage what is left.  We’re thinking about just finding friends to help us move since there’s so little time to save up the money it costs for movers – unless I can get my student loans deferred for a month or two.  Or if I get a good tax refund which I don’t expect since I’m getting dangerously close to a tax bracket which doesn’t reflect the amount of debt I have (like the student loans).  It’ll be a few weeks before I know that though.

I really hope all this cleaning will bring me more into balance.  I’ve been so touchy this week, not sleeping well, and overall not in a good place which doesn’t make much sense.  Carrie’s recovering from her major sprains, but seizure free still (just one tiny glitch from lack of sleep).  My job isn’t very stressful anymore.  I don’t really know what’s going on beyond needing to get moving on things.  I need to be physical again and plan to slip in some wii fit this weekend.  I’m cooking again and cleaning.  Perhaps I just need my routine back.  Oh well.  In any case, I better get to bed.  I want to read more of my book (Dorothy Allison’s Cave dweller) and still need sleep.  Lots to do tomorrow!

Carrie hospital update

Saturday afternoon we went to the ER as Carrie was seizing and throwing up her medication due to dizziness.  After a few practically useless hours in the ER she was admitted to the hospital.  Her medication levels were all good and actually a bit high so clearly it wasn’t working.  We spent the night up there with the nurses calling doctors occasionally to get guidance for her care.  The manager actually drove to CVS and got Carrie nicorette gum because they couldn’t let her go downstairs to smoke while she was on bed rest for seizures.  She wasn’t happy but what can you do?  She was in a ton of pain due to dislocating her shoulder multiple times and aggravating her sprained ankles but they refused to give her anything narcotic (aka anything useful) until the next day.  It was a long night.  We finally saw a very knowledgeable neurologist Sunday afternoon.  She wanted Carrie to go to the Epilepsy Monitoring Unit, but first she had to get stable.  She wanted to try Keppra because Carrie’s liver is not doing well.  It’s not dire yet, it can heal, but she needed to try a medication that didn’t cause further damage to the liver.  Since Sunday afternoon when Carrie received her first dose of Keppra she hasn’t had even the tiniest of seizures!  This is a huge development since I can’t remember the last time we went this long without a single seizure event of any type.

Carrie was discharged today.  During her stay she saw an orthopedic surgeon about her shoulder, one or two neurologists, and regular doctors as well.  They took x-rays, an ultrasound of all her major organs, and a ct scan of her head.  It was a bit of a pain but to have this much control the first time she tries a medication is a miracle and to me worth it all.  They didn’t even press to transfer her to Houston for EMU until they’re ready to adjust medications.  She still needs to greatly reduce her medications to protect her liver and reduce side affects.  Once the Keppra is solidly in her system it should be safe to start backing off the Dilantin and Trileptal.  The Depakote will continue to be transitioned to Lamictal.  At the end of this she should only be on two anti-seizure medications instead of the current five, but hopefully Lamictal will just be at the bipolar management level rather than seizure management level which is higher I would think.

I finally have not only hope but results.  It’s been a very long couple of years, especially the past year which has been horrendous.  I took a job without knowing how it could possibly work out when Carrie was as sick as she was.  But I had faith that things would work out, which I believe has been my core spiritual belief my entire life.  I didn’t think it could turn around with a single dose of medication, yet here we are!  Now I can see that this can work out.  She’ll still need help, but not 24 hour care help.  I don’t know how long it will be before she has another seizure.  I know this journey isn’t over, but it’s a nice breather.  She’s finally getting to heal as she needs to, enjoy being the same person for more than a few hours at a time, and start living again.  It’s about time!

Holidays 2009: Evansville to New London

After our day of rest in Evansville it was time to head north.  After much thought and discussion with Lenny’s trucker friend we decided to head up highway 41 rather than go ~100 miles out of the way to hit interstate.  It was a beautiful drive and I’m quite glad I did it.  We got to see lots of little streams, hills, and trees which we don’t get to see much in Houston.  It’s flat…dead flat…and I really miss any topography at all.  You don’t realize how hilly the midwest can be until you live in the flatness of the coast.  The drive was good for my soul.  We had to cancel our stop in Chicago to meet up with Angelus, a fellow Jedi, but we had gotten too late of a start.  The 500 mile trip always takes longer when it requires driving through Chicago, but we made it in safely around 930.

The next day, Tuesday, we drove into Appleton to get tacos at Taco Johns.  We hoped to meet my brother but missed him since he worked a split shift.  On the way back Carrie had a seizure in the car and managed to get her leg caught up in the heating vent in the car giving her two sprained ankles and a sprained knee.  We went to the hospital to help with the pain and make sure nothing else happened.  The doctor gave her liquid lortabs, which was a first.  Unfortunately she had a reaction after taking it a few days and we ended up back in the ER for the allergic reaction which is apparently due to the new Lamictal medication which makes people more susceptible to allergies.  Fun…

Anyway, after getting Carrie home I went to my Aunt Diane’s to make chocolate covered food with my mom, grandma, Aunt Angela, Cousin Brenda and her boyfriend Josh (I think) while my nephew and cousins ran around the house.  I only got to stay an hour or two because Carrie needed help, but it was fun while it lasted.   I’m still eating the candy which we didn’t pick up until the day before we left.  The night was a bit eventful when I forgot just how steep Diane and Denny’s driveway is.  The roads weren’t bad but there was a few inches of snow halfway up their hill.  I made it almost all the way up before I lost my momentum.  Rather than getting stuck I tried to back down so I could try again but couldn’t see the driveway and ended up in the space between where it loops back around which was even deeper snow!  I had to rock my car back and forth quite a bit before I could turn it around and not be stuck anymore.  Thankfully no one saw me, but everyone had a good laugh about me being parked at the bottom of the hill, facing the wrong way. lol  I just didn’t want to risk it to make another run at it.  I don’t think my tires were up to the snowy hill.

The next day was a day of cleaning and preparing for Christmas Eve.  My primary goal was to clean out the dining room so we could all sit at the table the next day.  I got quite a bit done but still had plenty to do the next day.  That night I ran to Appleton to pick up my brother after work.  His wife and son had already been at the house for a while as everyone was spending the night so we could have Christmas morning on Christmas Eve.  It’s the way it works out with the visitation schedule for Brilee.  It’s good they came out early because it started to snow and get a little slick by the time we were coming back from town.  By the time we got back my parents had put the presents out under the tree, since Brilee was passed out downstairs.  There were lots of presents, though a smaller year than other previous years which was purposeful.  Everyone still got plenty of awesome presents but didn’t cost as much.  Pictures can be found here.

The next morning was great fun.  Carrie was a trooper and did a great job with the turkey, dressing, and cole slaw.  Carrie M (my brother’s wife) loved the cole slaw and had never had any that she liked.  Actually she ate quite a bit of everything over the next few days which is good.  She’s 7 months pregnant and needs good food.  :-)  I made mashed potatoes, green bean casserole, rolls, and corn (which we really didn’t need after all.)  My mom helped as much as she could and my brother was helpful with some more cleaning before my Grandma came over.  My only wish is that we had spent more time together.  They had to take Brilee back by 6 and then he was at his mom’s the rest of the vacation.  Plus Carrie’s ankles and knee were so swollen it wasn’t good to leave her home alone.  Overall it was good though.

Sunday was the Packer game with my dad, Uncle Dale, Cousin Corey and his girlfriend Terri.  It was amazing!  I was all bundled up with borrowed snow pants, boots and gloves, as well as some heaters so I didn’t get too cold ever.  I didn’t even zip up my jacket until halftime.  The weather was chilly but a perfect winter day in the end.  I just loved it.  Our seats were pretty awesome, the Packers kicked major Seattle ass, and in the end there’s no experience like Lambeau Field.   It was my first time in the remodeled stadium and it is amazing.  Clearly words can’t express how I felt being there.  The whole experience is super fun!

That’s me, my cousin, and my dad.  She had tickets with her fiance down in row 4 near the 50 yard line but came to find us all in the 3rd quarter.  I’m glad because I forgot my camera in my car and didn’t take many pictures.

Overall I wish I would have had more time with my family but the visit was good.  I hope we can go home next year but that remains to be seen after I start the new job.